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Teen Granddaughters’ Thoughts

Craig and I had our two teen granddaughters stay with us for one week, and the four of us were on a day trip when my General Practitioner called and told me about the results from the biopsy. The call came much sooner than I anticipated. I had been open with our children about the potential of cancer and left it up to them if they wanted to tell their children (then ages less than one to 20) or not. They all told their children. This made it easier when my doctor called as it was not a complete surprise for the girls that were visiting.

It can be difficult to decide if it is better to tell children or not, but I am a firm believer in not keeping those kinds of secrets. It will come out eventually, and there might be hard feelings then. 


Here are my granddaughters’ thoughts from that day (I am Farmor) - 

E: “When my Farmor answered the phone and stopped in her tracks, I knew it was bad news. My sister and I stopped a little ahead, trying not to eavesdrop. We walked into the restaurant, sat down, and that’s when Farmor told us. 

It wasn’t really a surprise. Because of what my parents had told us before, I had already been processing it as if it were cancer. I think this is why the rest of the day/trip wasn’t tainted or scary. In fact, the rest of the day was nice. When I think about that daytrip, the moment that first comes to mind is sitting with my Farmor in front of a pond. It was so peaceful and beautiful, and it doesn’t feel tainted at all (even with the news she had cancer).

What also helped is how everyone talked about it, telling us it would be fairly simple (compared to other cancer cases) to get control over. This is why the thought of losing her never really crossed my mind, and I wasn’t all that scared. I knew it would be a fight for her, and very hard, but I didn’t ever believe she wouldn’t get through it. I have always seen her as strong in every way.

Through the rest of our stay with my grandparents, my mindset was focusing on her, and trying to make the most of it before she had to start treatment. Even with the overhead of cancer, the week was still so much fun (we started to make it almost tradition!).”


S: “The day that my Farmor got the call we were at this place that I cannot ever remember the name of. It was beautiful and just a great place. When she got the call at first I was scared because I didn’t know anything yet and so many things can happen. I love her so much and I didn’t want anything bad to happen. However, at the same time I had no fear whatsoever. I knew that everything was going to be fine, especially after she told my sister and me that it could all be taken care of. But the main reason I wasn’t scared is because she is such an amazing and strong woman. I knew and I still know she is going to be okay. I’m so glad that I could be there with her when she got the call. I always want to be there for her and all of my family. She is really important to me and she’s okay and that’s all I need.” 



I am grateful that they were not overly concerned. I believe that is mainly because we were so open with them and told them there was a high probability that I would be okay. Most children understand that we cannot know everything, but it is important that we are honest with the information that we do have. They are more aware than we realize, and I believe most of them appreciate when we are truthful with them. Not being honest with what we are going through is something I believe can be hurtful, and because I love my family very much I could not keep these kinds of secrets from them.

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